Notification
by WellI'mNotSteadyAtAll
Summary: Every member of New Directions has their own uses for FaceBook.
1. FinnBox

***1 Inbox Message**

**Rachel Berry:**

Good Evening Finn,

This is incredibly hard for me too, okay? I never wanted to hurt you, but you have to understand that our time has passed Finn. We were wonderful together, but that was then. It is in the past, and yes, while becoming romantically involved previously was a most delightful and interesting idea, now I am more delighted and interested in becoming just friends. Our friendship, though tainted by the apparent awkwardness of ex-lovers, is one that I still cherish, (mostly because I am hard pushed to find any other true friendship within my fellow Glee Clubbers.)

But Finn, though I understand if you wish to cut ties with me after this, I ask you to take into account one thing: I will not take you back, not because I do not love you, but because I do not love you enough. My heart does not belong to you, or Jesse, or anybody else for this moment, it belongs to me.

I intend to find myself in these coming summer months, and I would prefer to do so without a romantic partner, who knows? Perhaps I will find a new and refreshing face to duet with…

Sorry Finn.

Rachel Berry *(-please have the courtesy to pretend its gold).

***Replies:**

**Santana Lopez:**

Ouch Frankenteen, that's gotta hurt! Sorry, but this time you can find another booty call.

**Mercedes Jones:**

Girl! That is low!

**Kurt Hummel:**

She does know she forwarded this to the whole club…doesn't she?

**Noah Puckerman:**

Umm, wow…the awkward moment when…

**Quinn Fabray:**

Not the time Noah.

**Finn Hudson:**

Oh my god.

**Santana Lopez:**

Need some ice with that backhander?

**Rachel Berry:**

Oh gosh…Finn…I'm so sorry…

**Finn Hudson:**

How could you do this to me?

**Rachel Berry:**

Trust me; this is just as embarrassing for me as it is for you.

**Kurt Hummel:**

And it's awkward for ALL of us!

**Quinn Fabray:**

For once I think Man-hand's has done something right!

**Noah Puckerman:**

…..

**Mercedes Jones:**

Say what?

**Finn Hudson:**

Guys, can all of you just delete this message, I think Rachel and I need to talk about this alone.

**Noah Puckerman:**

Not our fault your girl added us all!

**Finn Hudson:**

Puck! FFS! She's not my girl.

**Rachel Berry:**

So you're finally getting the message?

**Santana Lopez:**

BURN!

**Quinn Fabray:**

LMFAO.

**Finn Hudson:**

OMG that's it, choir room, first period, tomorrow. Don't be late Rachel.

**Rachel Berry:**

But we have Spanish Finn.

**Finn Hudson:**

Be there.

**Rachel Berry:**

Fine.

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce:**

Can I come too?

**Santana Lopez:**

Britt, she sent it to you too?

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce:**

Uh, yeah. Rachel has a group called "Gleeks" on her messages; she can send a message to all of us at the same time if she wants. I think she clicked on the wrong group.

**Quinn Fabray:**

You think?

**Santana Lopez:**

Wait, how do you know that Britt? About the group?

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce:**

When Rachel and I were filming Fondue for Two last week.

**Kurt Hummel:**

Guys, notifications much! Can you take this to chat or a different inbox, it's spamming my laptop.

**Mike "Cable" Chang:**

Yeah same here.

**Tina Cohen-Chang:**

Mike! You aren't supposed to be on Facebook, you said it wasn't a good reflection on the Asian community to be tied with technology all the time.

**Mike "Cable" Chang:**

You're on it too!

**Kurt Hummel:**

GUYS!

**Mercedes Jones:**

Kurt's right you guys, totally getting overloaded by notifications here.

**Mike "Cable" Chang:**

Sorry, I think Tina and I won't be on Facebook for a while either.

**Tina Cohen-Chang:**

-.-

**Santana Lopez:**

Please! Even the emoticons look fucking Asian!

**Noah Puckerman**

LOL!

**Mercedes Jones:**

Santana!

**Santana Lopez:**

What?

What?

…Sorry. But it WAS funny.

**Noah Puckerman:**

True that.


	2. Latina Barbie

***Finn Hudson has gone from "In a Relationship" to "Single".**

**Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez and Quinn Fabray like this.**

**Finn Hudson: **Well you would wouldn't you.

**Kurt Hummel: **=/ I have to agree that it's for the best.

**Finn Hudson: **Whatever Kurt. If this were a year ago you'd be jumping on this.

**Santana Lopez: **Yo, Frankenteen, back off Kurt!

**Kurt Hummel: **Um, thanks Santana?

**Santana Lopez: **No problem, if you need any help **Dave** and I are on call, okay?

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Why'd you tag me?

**Santana Lopez: **IDK.

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Oh…okay.

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **Finn does that mean you and Santana are gonna do it again?

**Kurt Hummel: **=S Awkward…

**Santana Lopez: **Britt!

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Umm, WTF?

**Santana Lopez: **FFS don't act like you didn't know.

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **But I didn't!

**Santana Lopez: **Ah, Dios mío, usted está como un imbécil por eso que estoy incluso a hacer su trabajo?

**Kurt ****Hummel****: **Santana, such a thing as Google translate exists you know.

**Santana Lopez: **Then he should know exactly what I just said.

* * *

><p><strong>*Chat (Online 27)<strong>

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **-.- You're making this hard Lopez.

**Santana Lopez: **Do you think it was gonna be easy in the first place?

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **…no.

Look. Why are we doing this?

**Santana Lopez: **Because you're a coward?

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Wait, who's a coward?

**Santana Lopez: **...Fine, because WE are cowards. But what else are we supposed to do?

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **IDK, something better than this.

**Santana Lopez: **Tbh, I think this US thing was a bad idea.

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Me too.

**Santana Lopez: **So I guess we're breaking up then.

**Dave "The Fury" Karofsky: **Uh, yeah. I guess.

**Santana Lopez: **Meh. -_-

* * *

><p><strong>*Santana Lopez has gone from "In a Relationship" to "Single"<strong>

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce likes this.**

**Santana Lopez: **You should do. It's your fault -.-

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **=/ Sorry.

**Santana Lopez: **No you're not.

**Artie Abrams: **Don't talk to Brittany like that.

**Santana Lopez: **Or what Hot Wheels? Gonna run me over; blind me with your headlights?

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **Artie, what you said was really mean too. You called me stupid. You don't have a right to stick up for me.

**Santana Lopez: **Burn bitch.

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **Stop being a dotch Santana.

**Santana Lopez: **A what?

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **A dotch!

**Artie Abrams: **I think she means douche.

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **No, I mean dotch! I'm not stupid Artie.

**Artie Abrams: **WTF! I didn't say that.

**Santana Lopez: **Yeah you did…remember?

**Artie Abrams: **Why don't you just back off Lopez? You think you're so fly because you're HBIC but one thing you didn't get is that you're only top because people are scared of you!

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **Artie! GTFO Santana's page now.

**Artie Abrams: **But Britt!

**Santana Lopez: **You heard her cripple pants.

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **Artie has cripple pants? Maybe he should wear different pants and he could walk again. YAY! Artie, change your pants!

**Artie Abrams: **….

**Santana Lopez: -_- **FFS.

* * *

><p><strong>*Online Chat (12)<strong>

**Quinn Fabray: **Whow, shits going down.

**Santana Lopez: **What do you want Preggo?

**Quinn Fabray: **To see if you're okay. Puck said you were getting grief from Artie.

**Santana Lopez: **Nothing I can't handle. I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent Preggo, a little wheelchair nerd is nothing compared to growing up there.

**Quinn Fabray: **W/e San. LHA isn't half as bad as you make it out to be. Just like you.

**Santana Lopez: **Ugh, enough already go eat some bacon ice cream or something.

**Quinn Fabray: **I'm not pregnant anymore Lopez.

**Santana Lopez: **Really? I coulda sworn that little critter had a twin the way you're squeezing through doors atm.

**Quinn Fabray: **OMG you're so impossible. Listen Latina Barbie, you know where I am if you need me, until then, stop taking your self-hatred out on everyone else. It's getting old.

***Quinn Fabray is offline. Your messages will be sent to her inbox.**

**Santana Lopez: **Sorry Q. And thanks.


	3. Just A Quinnocent Chat

***Rachel Berry: **LOL! Can't believe **Blaine "DW" Anderson **and **Kurt Hummel **actually argued about scarves today, great shopping trip boys!

***Kurt Hummel, Blaine "DW" Anderson and Tina Cohen-Chang like this.**

**Kurt Hummel: **Silk is for the older generation!

**Blaine "DW" Anderson: **Excuse me; I think you'll find it very stylish, especially when coupled with a relevant brooch.

**Tina Cohen-Chang: **ROFL! Can't believe I couldn't make it, sorry guys, Mike said I couldn't miss Dim Sum with his mom…-.-

**Mercedes Jones: **Why wasn't I invited?

**Rachel Berry: **Cause you're at your aunts!

**Mercedes Jones: **=/ coulda still asked me…

**Blaine "DW" Anderson: **You were there in spirit Mercedes darling.

**Mercedes Jones: **=D thanks Blaine!

**Mercedes Jones: **BTW, what up with the "DW"? Does it mean Don't Worry?

**Kurt Hummel: **Dalton Warbler…how academically patriotic he is.

**Mercedes Jones: **Naw, I think it's cute.

**Kurt Hummel: **-. - Back off my man Jones…

***Rachel Berry likes this.**

* * *

><p><strong>*Inbox (2)<strong>

**Quinn Fabray:**

Okay man hands, let's make a deal here. You'll tell me exactly what's going on with you and Finn and I'll agree to not slushie you for the next two years.

**Quinn Fabray: **

And don't deny it because I know that there is something going on.

* * *

><p><strong>*Online Chat (15)<strong>

**Rachel Berry: **Umm, Quinn. What's up with the inbox?

**Quinn Fabray: **What do you mean what's up? I saw you and Frankenteen in the corridor today.

**Rachel Berry: **We were having a polite conversation as friends Quinn. Is that such a strange concept to you?

**Quinn Fabray: **What, friends? What do you think Santana and Brittany are, my bitches?

**Rachel Berry: **Actually I was referring to polite conversation, but do you trust them? Last time I checked neither of them where there for you.

**Quinn Fabray: **W/e Ru Paul, when you get friends, THEN you can lecture me.

**Rachel Berry: **And whose fault here is it that I haven't got any friends?

***Quinn Fabray is offline. Your messages will be sent to her inbox.**

* * *

><p><strong>*Inbox (1)<strong>

***Replies:**

**Rachel Berry:**

I know you're scared Quinn, but you have to stop running away from things, especially the truth. Which, invariably, it is your fault I am a social reject with little than my career driven mind for company.

But in answer to your earlier inbox message, Finn and I are just friends; I do not have the intention to become any more than that at all. (As so openly shown by my stupidly forwarded message last week).

He and I were conversing about his new job with Kurt's dad thank you very much.

One word of advice, take it or leave it: Stop trying to be on top of everything, I know you and I do not get along but I have seen the difference in you, let things flow for a while and stop trying to control things. True I too have some control and trust issues but I find that sometimes letting ones guard down and relaxing into the flow is a good exercise to let your mind at ease.

* * *

><p><strong>*Quinn Fabray - Rachel Berry<strong>

**Quinn Fabray: **Ugh. Next time you ramble I am blocking you, okay Treasure Trail?

* * *

><p><strong>*Inbox (1)<strong>

**Quinn Fabray: **Thanks Berry.


	4. A Beautiful Acquaintanceship

***Santana Lopez: **Is definitely not signing up for Glee club next year.

***Dave "The Fury" Karofsky likes this.**

**Brittany "Ducky" Peirce: **But San, then how will we sing a duet?

**Santana ****Lopez: **Forget the duet it obviously doesn't mean anything.

**Quinn Fabray: **I think you should calm down.

**Santana Lopez: **STFU Preggo.

**Kurt Hummel: **She's only trying to help Santana.

**Quinn Fabray: **Thanks Kurt, but I don't think she's in the grateful mood.

**Sant****ana Lopez: **Damn right I'm not, I mean, WTF. How can I be in the same room with him anymore?

**Sam "****Toruk Makto" Evans: **Santana's right, what Artie did today was terrible.

**Kurt Hummel: **I think we all agree with that Sam, but what I don't agree with is losing a valuable member of the Glee club to a stupid argument.

**Rachel Berry: **As honorary member of the Glee club I have to agree with Kurt, I hate to have to say this, but Santana is a vitally important piece of the clubs puzzle, she's the critical and down to earth eye we need when controlling the quality of the performance.

**Quinn Fabray: **What did I say about ranting Ru Paul?

**Kurt Hummel: **No, she has a point.

**Rachel Berry: **=P

**Quinn Fabray: **Ugh.

**Quinn Fabray: **Anyway, I guess what we're trying to say is, please don't leave. We need you.

* * *

><p><strong>*Online Chat (32)<strong>

**Santana Lopez: **Did you really mean what you said?

**Kurt Hummel: **That it was a stupid argument, yeah.

**Santana Lopez: **No, about, me.

Being valuable.

…..

Okay, Kurt, stop writing so much you're making me nervous.

**Kurt Hummel: **Santana Lopez…nervous? =P

**Santana Lopez: **Whatever.

What were you writing that took you so long?

**Kurt Hummel: **I was just making a list of how valuable you are, but I guess im scratching "patient" off of it.

**Santana Lopez: **Ha fricking ha.

Kurt?

**Kurt**** Hummel: **Santana?

**Santana Lopez: **How do you do it?

**Kurt Hummel: **Err. I'm not implying you're stupid but, obviously when it's two men…

**Santana Lopez: **Okay!

I wasn't talking about that.

I meant coming out.

**Kurt Hummel: **I don't really know.

You just, tell people.

Why?

**Santana Lopez: **You just tell people?

**Kurt Hummel: **Yeah.

Why?

Santana?

Are you okay?

**Santana Lopez: **I'm gay.

Kurt.

Elizabeth!

**Kurt Hummel: **Sorry, just, didn't see that one coming.

**Santana Lopez: **That's what she said =P

**Kurt Hummel: **Very mature of you.

**Santana Lopez: **Why thank you.

**Kurt Hummel: **So it's not just a stupid argument then?

**Santana Lopez: **What do you mean?

Kurt, you're writing loads again.

Come on!

**Kurt Hummel: **You're not fighting with Artie for Brittany's company as a friend. You're fighting for her love.

**Santana Lopez: **Well done.

**Kurt Hummel: **You know, I admire you.

**Santana Lopez: **What?

**Kurt Hummel: **You.

I can't say I wouldn't have guessed, but still.

If it were me, Brittany would have already been tearfully serenaded like Tony sang to Maria in West Side Story and just like that I would have tried to sweep her off her feet.

But not you.

Not so much of a declaration to anyone.

I assume she knows though…?

**Santana Lopez: **Of course, you think I've been a bitch because Dave and I broke up? Well, I haven't.

Truth is, I got together with him to hide my feelings about Brittany.

**Kurt Hummel: **But I thought it was because he's gay!

**Santana Lopez: **That too.

**Kurt Hummel: **Oh.

Wow.

I feel so out of the queer loop it's unreal.

And the fact that I'm talking to Santana Lopez right now with polite responses is…other worldly.

**Santana Lopez: **Gee. Thanks.

Listen.

I trust you Kurt.

Not just because you're a trustworthy guy but...

Because I trust you to guide me through this.

I know you had trouble but, I feel, maybe, that we could watch each other's backs or something.

You know?

Kurt?

**Kurt Hummel: **This whole thing has really changed you, hasn't it?

**Santana Lopez: **I guess.

**Kurt Hummel: **Santana.

You know, even after you've been a royal bitch to everyone, what Artie did, now I understand the reason, is ten times worse. I can't believe he managed to treat both you and Brittany like that, playing you off against one another just to get Britt back.

Listen.

I've got your back. Since you helped me back into McKinley, I guess I owe you one. But I'm doing this because I'm your FRIEND not because I'm indebted to you. Okay?

**Santana Lopez: **Friend? Can't we just be acquaintances for now?

I haven't had any other friends than Brittany, and I fell in love with her.

So I'm kinda feeling a bit vulnerable in the friend department.

**Kurt Hummel: **Acquaintances it is then.

Coffee Thursday?

**Santana Lopez: **Sure, only, nowhere people go.

**Kurt Hummel: **I suppose our "acquaintanceship" is going to be a secret for a while, huh?

**Santana Lopez: **Do you mind?

**Kurt Hummel: **Of course not.

I always wanted to play the first gay James Bond =].

**Santana Lopez: **LMFAO.

That makes me the first lesbian Bond girl.

**Kurt Hummel: **Indeed it does.


	5. What One Implies

***Online Chat (1)**

**Rachel Berry: **We need to talk.

Hello?

Quinn.

QUINNNNNNN!

**Quinn Fabray: **Oh my god, I can even hear your voice and how you said that.

**Rachel Berry: **So not creepy at all.

Anyway.

We need to talk.

**Quinn Fabray: **You said that already.

**Rachel Berry: **Well, we do.

**Quinn Fabray: **Well, we are.

**Rachel Berry: **Okay. So you know how Kurt and Blaine are together?

**Quinn Fabray: **Really? I hadn't noticed.

**Rachel Berry: **Now is not the time for sarcasm Quinn!

**Quinn Fabray: **Oh right sorry. I always do what you tell me.

**Rachel Berry: **Whatever.

Now, as I was saying.

**Quinn Fabray: **Blaine and Kurt.

**Rachel Berry: **Yes. I remember.

**Quinn Fabray: **What about them?

**Rachel Berry: **I'm getting there!

**Quinn Fabray: **Berry, if you're ranting again…

Stop writing so much.

I'm going to log off soon if you're not careful.

**Rachel Berry: **Well, Blaine and Kurt are dating, and Blaine has a friend called Jackson. Jackson was dating this girl called Melanie at our school who once had a one night stand with Edward Mason (the tall one from senior year) and then Edward's older brother David is engaged to Flora Larson. And guess what! Flora is my second cousin!

Are you impressed?

**Quinn Fabray: **At what, your ability to type an essay less interesting than a Sylvester lecture?

No. What significance does that have to me Ru Paul?

**Rachel Berry: **It means that I am connected to Blaine!

**Quinn Fabray: **And somehow we're all related to Adam and Eve. So what, my older sister's best friend from high school is now dating the photographer for the latest Vogue shoot. Do you see me flaunting my six degrees of separation?

**Rachel Berry: **I just thought you'd be interested.

**Quinn Fabray: **There's no one else online, is there?

**Rachel Berry: **-.- No.

**Quinn Fabray: **LMFAO. You're so Berry.

**Rachel Berry: **Don't laugh.

I was excited.

**Quinn Fabray: **So I can see.

You know, I actually did appreciate what you did to Finn.

**Rachel Berry: **What do you mean?

**Quinn Fabray: **You stood up to him. Instead of letting him dump you, or dump me like he has before, you told him for once that HE is the one that YOU don't need.

If I didn't hate you, I'd say I'm actually kinda proud of you.

**Rachel Berry: **Well I don't hate you, and I can tell you that I'm proud of you. For staying out of the drama these past couple of weeks.

It's been going down in Artie/Santana/Brittany world lately.

And somehow Kurt's got involved.

**Quinn Fabray: **IKR! What's that about?

**Rachel Berry: **Maybe we should ask Blaine?

**Quinn Fabray: **But that would imply we are snooping.

**Rachel Berry: **Which would imply it is something Kurt wants to keep a secret.

**Quinn Fabray: **And the fact we want to know implies that we are both gossips.

**Rachel Berry: **And that is a perfect reason to imply that we get coffee this Thursday with said Warbler.

**Quinn Fabray: **Which implies you and I are on the same team.

**Rachel Berry: **Are you ready to imply that you can handle that?

**Quinn Fabray: **Temporarily. I can handle anything if it means hot gossip.

**Rachel Berry: **And so operation "Catch the Warbler" commences.

**Quinn Fabray: **Hmmm.

Rachel?

**Rachel Berry: **=O

**Quinn Fabray: **What?

What?

**Rachel Berry: **You called me Rachel.

**Quinn Fabray: **No, I didn't, we're typing.

**Rachel Berry: **Same difference.

**Quinn Fabray: **Right.

**Rachel Berry: **I'm sorry, how rude of me.

What were you going to say?

**Quinn Fabray: **It doesn't matter now.

**Rachel Berry: **Yes it does.

**Quinn Fabray: **No. You ruined the moment.

I'm tired.

I'm going to bed.

**Rachel Berry: **Are you implying you are a chicken?

That you are scared of what you were going to say =P?

**Quinn Fabray: **No.

I'm IMPLYING I'm tired and that I'm going to bed.

Good night.

***Quinn Fabray is offline. Your messages will be sent to her inbox.**

**Rachel Berry: **Oh. Good night. Lol.


End file.
